I would like very much to pick out my little boy's "coming home from the hospital" clothes, but I can't yet. I'm afraid. I want to start planning the nursery decor for him, choosing bedding and buying a crib, but I can't quite do those things either. To be sure, it is a total joy to feel our baby jumpin' around inside me; to hear the heartbeat, to even think of his sweetness and newborn smell. A gift!!! So my conversations with the Lord go something like this lately:
Is it really happening, Lord? Will this child be healthy? Will he be able to see my face...will he actually respond to my voice? Or will I be faced with another life-altering conversation with a panel of doctors bearing bad news? I really, really can't face that thought; every part of me wants to crumble into a million pieces.
I rest in the fact that you, Lord, are trustworthy. So I will trust you, and not be afraid.
"Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.'"
